Humorous Cryptograms

“A collection of 400 witty or humorous quotations along with their authors’ names…have been enciphered into simple substitution ciphers with retained word divisions. Authors include Groucho Marx, Andy Rooney, Bill Cosby, David Letterman, Bob Hope, Emma Bombeck and many more…Excellent and…fun.”—Cryptologia. If stuck, get help from special clue sections.